How to choose bridesmaids? The process of choosing your bridesmaids can be both thrilling and daunting. So, this all-inclusive guide will lead you step by step in selecting the ideal bridesmaids. You will receive practical advice and valuable insights on assessing relationships, dynamics, logistics, and effective communication. With these tools, you can ensure the formation of a harmonious and supportive group of bridesmaids who will stand beside you on your momentous day. So, let’s check with Viva Wedding Photography!
Essential things on how to choose your bridesmaids
1. Make a list of the people you feel the most connected to
Selecting bridesmaids can be daunting, but a helpful approach is to begin by listing your closest friends and family members. It’s important to keep in mind that while you may have a close relationship with women like your mother, aunt, or future mother-in-law, they typically don’t expect to be asked to be bridesmaids. The role of bridesmaids is usually reserved for peers such as female friends, sisters (or sisters-in-law), and cousins.
2. Keep in mind that your bridesmaids may be males
There is no valid reason to exclude your best male friend or brother from being part of your wedding party. It is increasingly common for couples to invite members of the opposite sex to stand alongside them. In such cases, a man standing on the bride’s side is called an attendant or bridesman, while a woman standing on the groom’s side can be called a groomswoman. The decision is entirely yours, and the most important factor is including your favorite people, regardless of gender.
Regarding the dress code, no strict guidelines dictate how to dress your bridesmen. They can match the groomsmen or coordinate their suits with the bridesmaid dresses. The key consideration is to ensure that they feel comfortable with the attire you choose for them.
3. Consider your potential bridesmaid’s reliability
Your bridal party serves a much greater purpose than simply wearing stylish dresses and accompanying the groomsmen. They are an integral part of your support system and play a vital role in the wedding process, including:
- Take charge of the bridal shower and bachelorette party arrangements.
- Support you in selecting the ideal wedding gown (along with coordinating bridesmaid dresses).
- Help you to handle nervousness and anxiety.
- Assist with various tasks to simplify your wedding planning process.
Therefore, when it comes to “How to choose bridesmaids?” it’s important to consider who is genuinely committed to fulfilling the responsibilities and who won’t unexpectedly back out. Every group tends to have that one friend known for being consistently late, seemingly operating on a slightly different schedule than everyone else. It’s simply a part of who they are. This is a factor worth pondering before selecting the ladies for your tribe.
4. Decide whether you want an even number of bridesmaids and groomsmen
While there is no requirement for your wedding party to be evenly balanced, some couples prefer to have an equal number of bridesmaids and groomsmen, often to ensure balanced photos.
It is important to communicate with your fiancé and discuss their preference, making the decision together. The average number of bridesmaids and groomsmen is typically around 5 on each side, but you can choose as many as you desire.
>>> Further reading: How Many People Should I Invite To My Wedding In 2024?
5. Think about bridesmaids’ availability
While you may care about certain people in your life, there are situations like having a demanding job or a busy family that can make it hard for them to take on the role of a bridesmaid.
If you choose not to ask someone for these reasons, it’s essential to let them know it’s not because you don’t love them. Instead, explain that you don’t want to add extra responsibilities to their already busy life. This way, you can prevent any misunderstandings or hurt feelings.
6. Be mindful of your bridesmaids’ budget
It’s widely understood that being a bridesmaid or groomsman can put a dent in one’s wallet. The expenses can quickly accumulate, from flights and gifts to bachelor and bachelorette parties, even if you contribute to their accommodations or attire.
In this situation, if you wonder how to choose bridesmaids without hurting feelings, we highly recommend contacting your friend who may be facing financial difficulties and having a conversation about it. Inform them that you would be delighted to have them participate, but also offer some alternative options for them to be involved in case being part of the wedding party is too expensive for them.
7. Consider the dynamics between your potential bridesmaids and groomsmen
How to choose bridesmaids may be by no means easy, especially when it comes to mixed groups. So, if you intend to have events involving your entire wedding party, like a combined bachelor and bachelorette gathering, it’s worth considering the potential dynamics within the group.
For instance, if one of the potential bridesmaids recently went through a difficult breakup with one of the potential groomsmen, it’s important to recognize the potential conflicts that could arise before including those individuals on your list. Taking such factors into account helps maintain a harmonious atmosphere and avoids potential tensions among your loved ones.
8. Determine whether you feel obligated to ask someone to be a bridesmaid
Are there one or two women in your life whom you hesitate to ask to be your bridesmaids, perhaps due to concerns about potential drama? It’s important to remember that this moment is a significant milestone in your life, and you have the freedom to choose the people who are truly right for you. Surround yourself with bridesmaids who will make you feel amazing on your special day. Don’t let fear or obligation dictate how to choose your bridal party.
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Other considerations on how to choose bridesmaids
9. Don’t choose someone only because they invited you to join their tribe
When you are faced with how to choose your bridesmaids, it is natural to feel guilty about not selecting someone who had chosen you as their bridesmaid (and this sentiment is completely understandable). To gain some clarity, you can ask yourself a fundamental question: Will my relationship with this person be as strong in five years as it is now?
In our opinion, it is acceptable not to reciprocate the bridesmaid offer. However, handling the situation with sensitivity, compassion, and care is important. If the individual wants to discuss why they are not included in your wedding, it is best to be completely honest. Explain that it was a challenging decision, but you genuinely felt that your bridal party should consist of the people closest to you at this particular stage of your life. Express that there were many other special people (including them) whom you regretfully had to leave out.
10. Assign roles to your close friends who aren’t bridesmaids
If there are friends you want to honor at your wedding but won’t be part of the bridal party, consider involving them in special roles. Think about their unique talents and how they can contribute to your big day.
For instance, you can ask a musically gifted friend to perform a song or invite a family member with excellent public speaking skills to give a heartfelt speech. Including them in these meaningful ways is how to choose bridesmaids and maid of honor without hurting the feelings of anyone.
>>> Recommend reading: How To Plan An Amazing Wedding On A Budget Of $5000
11. The ideal time for you to select my bridesmaids
Choosing your bridesmaids is a task that doesn’t require immediate action. It’s crucial to remember that once you’ve asked someone to be at your wedding party, you cannot retract the invitation. It may be tempting to ask all of your friends to join your bridal squad as soon as you get engaged, but it’s advisable to exercise restraint.
The selection process for your bridal squad holds significance, so it’s important not to rush it. Give yourself at least a month to consider your options, if possible. As a general guideline on how to pick bridesmaids, asking your bridesmaids between eight months to a year before your wedding is recommended. This timeframe allows ample time to organize various activities with your bridesmaids and ensure a smooth planning process.
12. How do you ask your friends about becoming bridesmaids
Once you have finalized your chosen group, formally invite your loved ones to be your bridesmaids. Traditionally, brides ask their friends and family members through a bridesmaid proposal gift, ranging from simple to extravagant. You may consider gifting personalized pajamas with their names, writing a heartfelt note in a card, or surprising them with a bridesmaid proposal box filled with spa-themed goodies.
Regardless of your chosen method, asking your bridesmaids is an enjoyable way to express your appreciation for their presence in your life and convey how grateful you are that they are joining you on your wedding journey.
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Finally, you have the answer to the question, “How to choose bridesmaids?” Choosing bridesmaids is an important decision that can greatly impact your wedding day. You can ensure a smooth and enjoyable process by following the helpful tips and guidelines provided by Viva Wedding Photography.